LOO TOPPER - PART II

Back in Loo Loo Land, the quest to make a smart top piece for our cobbled together back to wall toilet storage unit continues. 

Having firkled about with cardboard and scissors to fashion a template for this top section, we eventually arrived at something resembling our wonky gap.  Transfer template across to pine board then cut carefully taking care not to deviate greatly from any of the pencilled lines.

Blue Peter DIY badge

 

And even then, it’s still a case of continual sanding of edges to take off any ‘humps’ or that proverbial gnat’s whisker preventing the board from slotting straight into place.  There’s really no exact science here, just repetitive tweaking/sanding until it all fits.

Hurrah!   The plank finally fits the gap

 

Now that we’ve finally got the perfect plank, it’s over to our paint workshop (lounge floor) for a couple of coats of primer, paint and furniture lacquer.  Fingers crossed all this liquid doesn’t make the bloody thing expand as it’s a tight squeeze as it is.

Priming and painting in the 'workshop'

LEONARDSLEE GARDENS

Forget the budget, boats or bungling politicians for all of five minutes – it’s time to grab cagoule and camera to head off into the wilderness to blow away those mental cobwebs with a bit of autumnal therapy.

Where best to revel in the magnificent colours of autumn than exploring the meandering woodland pathways of Leonardslee Gardens near Horsham.

Welcome to Leonardslee Gardens

Enjoying the last rays of autumn at Leonardslee Gardens

Feel those delicious rays of sunlight caressing your cheeks or peeping through the leafy canopies of trees shedding their summer attire ready for wintry bedtime.

I'm not the only one enjoying the sunshine

Last rays of autumn

Breathe in the earthy scent as you stride along gravelly tracks looking out for wildlife lurking in the undergrowth.

Hmm... smells of moss and mushrooms

No deer spotted but plenty of pheasants or squirrels.

This pheasant's feathers make it almost seem invisible

A reminder that Christmas is coming

Look! A flame red leaf glistens like a ruby against brown foliage underfoot.

I've found a tree ruby

Another tree ruby

So many beautiful shapes and colours everywhere you gaze.

Glorious golden colours

Dive into tranquil waters

Drop your head back towards the sky (something you rarely do with a dodgy neck) to see the fabulous golden canopy of this Champion tree. It’s like a natural stained-glass window with its graceful branches contrasting beautifully against the blue.

The Champion Tree

There’s plenty of artistic surprises around every corner as the gardens also have sculptures nestled amongst the foliage. Just look at this cheeky chappy:

Or this super-sized foot reminding me that I’ve yet to chase up my NHS referral to Dr Clodhopper.

Best foot forward

Having hugged a few trees, shuffled through piles and piles of dry leaves, taken a million photos of bark, lakes and wallabies...

Eucalyptus tree up close

There are many lakes to discover on your travels

G'day mate

Yes, there's even a collection of these cute little furry jumpers – I feel amazingly invigorated.

Don't look now - it's the paparazzi

Leonardslee is a great place for peaceful re-connection with nature. 

The wonders of nature

I feel like dancing too

Good gravel paths, most not too steep so suitable for walkers of all ages or abilities. Small benches dotted around if you need a rest. I’m sure we’ll return to re-inspect the landscape once next year’s blooms have made an appearance.

See you again

You can’t beat Mother Nature when it comes to guiding you back to a more even keel. One thing’s for sure, autumn is never a dull season.

Autumn view across the trees

Hello kitty

I'd like one of these in my garden

TAX THRESHOLD RAID?

What is better – a bird in the hand or two in a bush?

Well, that rather depends from whose perspective you’re looking at it and in the case of the Chancellor, she’s eyeing up the two in the bush like a drooling hyena. Of course I don't mean real birds but tax thresholds.

Following this morning’s surprise U turn on the proposed income tax hike, desperate revenue raising measures are now needed to a) fill the mythical black hole and b) calm the stock markets.

There may have been a collective sigh of relief at the prospect of no direct income tax increase. Hand on heart, the Government can say it hasn’t broken its election manifesto pledges but what we can’t see are the fingers crossed behind their backs. There’s still time to break the pledge big time by effecting a pincer movement on tax in the form of indirect stealth increases.

On the one hand, pushing out the freeze on income tax thresholds for another few years will drag a lot of fish into the fiscal tax net including pensioners who rely solely on the state pension for their income. Whilst not directly increasing income tax rates, it is still a tax increase nonetheless for those who previously obtained money for nothing ie no or low productivity in the workplace.

Be careful what you wish for as the second scenario of lowering the income tax threshold will hurt more than paying an extra 2p in the pound. Let me elaborate further with a couple of examples:

Let’s say we have someone who earns a gross annual salary of £20,000. If the threshold for 20% income tax remains the same at £12,570 then tax would only be paid on the difference as follows:

Current tax rate and tax threshold 

You would only pay tax on £7,430 (total income minus threshold amount) which at a rate of 20% is approx. £1,486 per annum

Now let’s look at what happens to your tax bill if the income tax rate is increased by 2p from 20% to 22% but the threshold remains frozen at £12,570:

Tax up but threshold unchanged

With an increased tax rate, this person is now paying £149 more in income tax than if the rate had remained at 20%.

However, rewind the clock to the first example. The Treasury has decided to lower the income tax threshold by £1,000 to £11,570 leaving the income tax rate unchanged at 20%. What happens now?

Tax rate unchanged but threshold lowered

As you can see, lowering the threshold has increased the amount of tax payable because the chunk of money on which tax is calculated is larger. This person is now paying £200 more in income tax than if the rates or thresholds had stayed unchanged. The difference between paying 2p more in tax or having a lower threshold means you’ll be £51 worse off.

So, if I ask the same question again – which would be better, having a slight increase in the rate of taxation or having a lower income tax threshold then what’s your answer going to be?

My third scenario also means that if the threshold were reduced by £1,000 from next April, then the Treasury would benefit earlier from the effects of fiscal drag on the recent increase to the state pension as at £12,548 this would now push ALL retirees firmly into tax territory in 2026. As well as pushing all pensioners into the tax net, any low paid or part time workers could also be swept along by the tax tide making it pointless to work at all.

Having got a taste for it, there would be nothing to stop future Chancellors lowering the personal tax threshold figure again and again until it eventually disappears in a puff of smoke.  Perhaps this is their heinous master plan after all.

Even a small tweaking of the tax threshold may have a larger negative impact on your income than raising the basic rate of taxation so before you break out the champagne and canapes then I say again be very careful what you wish for. We may have escaped the income tax frying pan only to find an inferno beneath it!

LIZ FRANKS

Right, so I paid my £95 to a private health provider to get some quality time with an Orthopaedic doctor who just happens to be one the of local NHS consultants in the matter of foot or other limb associated problems.

After a lot of poking, prodding and painful pulling about of my little tootsies, he came to the conclusion that my foot trauma was not necessarily Arthur related but more likely to be caused by yet another unwelcome visitor called Liz Franks.

According to Dr Google, a Lisfranc injury can be a sprain, fracture or dislocation affecting the joints or ligaments midfoot in the general area of arch/toes. Precisely where I get excruciating pain on putting any weight evenly across my feet when walking. Called Lisfranc after a Napoleonic surgeon who no doubt amputated many a good foot from those afflicted by this condition.

To further investigate, I’d need to shell out £300 per foot for MRI scans – the cost of a Ryanair flight to sunnier climes or a small inflatable dinghy. Blimey! I might have found enough loose change down the back of the sofa for an initial consultation but £600 is one step beyond my limited means.

Not put off by my elevated eyebrows, the good doctor recommended getting an NHS referral via my GP to circumvent my financial necessity which as we all know translates into ‘it’ll be some time before we meet again’.

If I'm lucky, I may get passed over to Dr AI who at the speed of light may also be able to review all my other aches and pains as a holistic whole rather than piecemeal thus returning a more accurate diagnosis.  Had I identified as a horse then it would no doubt be a case of take her out into a field and shoot her but fortunately I'm feeling sleepy dormouse today so phew!

And so, dear readers, as I navigate the wonders of our surgery’s new online appointment system to request the suggested referral, I can only hope my foot hasn’t dropped off before I get to see the Orthopaedic chappie again.