THE LAWN RANGER

You know you’re getting older when you feel like the morning after but there’s been no night before ….

Every inch of my body aches!  Even sneezing sends pain ricocheting from muscle to muscle in my own personal post-gardening pinball machine.  I know the NHS is thinking of prescribing gardening instead of painkillers but give me Naproxen any day!

 

Healthcare-Arena and social prescribing

It’s my own stupid fault for deciding to repair the carnage left on the lawn by our builders after the soakaway was fitted instead of getting in professional lawn rangers to do the job.

Lawn carnage after soakaway fitted

 

Repairing the lawn

Ten out of ten awarded to our builders for the amazing work done on the new extension but a big fat zero for landscaping.  Anyone embarking on a construction project should ensure they set out their expectations for the quality of landscaping required around the finished build.  If I'd done this at the start of our project I wouldn't have ended up with a lawn lumpier than a beef stew with dumplings.

This is how our lawn was left by builders

 

How much soil do you need?

Having dug out the hastily thrown in clods of earth on top of the soakaway, it has taken two bulk bags of top soil to level out the top of the pit all of which had to be barrowed in from the front driveway.  That’s over 1,200 litres of soil.  

Sun’s out, guns out!  My arms are now as hard, brown and leathery as the best of landscapers having spent the last fortnight shifting this little lot.  This is definitely not what the chiropractor ordered for my bad neck.

 

Topping up the soakaway pit with soil

It’s often easy to underestimate the quantity of soil needed for this type of project as what looks like a huge bag of dirt doesn’t go far once it’s been compacted down.  We’ve used up every last drop of our bulk bags to patch up all the grassy bald patches and top up the side flower bed and that’s in addition to the 20 smaller bags of top soil we’d purchased earlier. 

 

Levelling and patching up the lawn

To top up the side border and complete the lawn repairs around 2,000 litres of top soil were used at a cost of almost £200.  Now I understand why there’s always a budget of about £4-£5,000 allocated on TV’s Garden Rescue’s revamping projects.  Pimping up your little piece of outdoor paradise doesn’t come cheap even if you are doing most of it yourself. 

Freshly sown grass seed under cover to stop birds

Let it grow

I’m hoping the grass seed I’ve sprinkled on top of all the soil patches will germinate before the pigeon posse gobble it all up.  What with all the hungry birds and the prolonged dry spell, it’ll be a miracle if anything grows.

VEGGING OUT

Veg is good for you!  If I’ve said this once, I’ve said it a million times to the other half who hates anything remotely green or healthy.  His veggie repertoire centres largely around the three Ps – peas, potatoes and parsnips.  Anything else is subject to debate. 

 

The joy of veg

But in my world a garden is incomplete without a small corner for growing fruit or veg, even more so now that the price of everything is so high. 

Take a gander at my coriander – seeds successfully germinated in an old loo roll middle.  I cook a lot of curries and coriander leaf/seeds are a staple ingredient of most recipes so to save some pennies, I’m growing my own. 

 

Growing my own coriander in loo rolls

Did you know you can also freeze coriander leaf?    Pick when fresh, chop up finely then put it in small bags or pots to freeze.  Add straight from the freezer when cooking.  Amazing!  I stumbled across this top money saving tip when searching for something else online so am giving it a try with some I bought earlier.  If this works then fresh parsley will also be added to my list of herbs to freeze as parsley is also quite easy to grow and widely used when cooking.

 

Coriander leaf can be frozen

What else have I got growing in my little veggie patch?  As I’ve only got a single veg bed then it’s half fruit and half veggies. 

My blackcurrant bush is doing very well in its sunny corner. 

 

Blackcurrants - so easy to grow

For its first year it’s already covered in flowers and as us gardeners know, flowers usually mean fruits will follow.  Blackcurrants are quite easy, fuss free fruit bushes to grow.  Less pruning than blackberry plants which can get quite messy rambling all over the place scruffily, blackcurrant bushes are more shrubby or compact in their growing habit.  If you don’t have a dedicated veggie area in your garden, a blackcurrant bush wouldn’t look out of place in a large patio planter or a corner of a flower bed.

 

Rhubarb crumble coming soon

King Charles is not the only one with a crown these days.  The rhubarb crowns I planted on the shadier side of the veg bed have settled in and are slowly displaying signs of growth but when I say slow growing I mean it’s like watching paint dry.  I’ve stopped checking them daily.

 

Pot grown tomato plants

Tomatoes are another regular feature in the curry cook book so these too have been added to the mix.  These were not grown from seed as I only wanted 5 plants but have already shot up since they first went in to the planters. 

Under the propagators I have sown carrots and dwarf French beans to complete this year’s veggie ensemble. 

Incubating beans and carrots

Beans have popped up under the cover

And in a tiny little corner next to the garden path, I've planted a few strawberries.  Strawberries are another easy fruit to grow ideal for patio pots or small sunny spaces like this one.  Over time these plants should fill this space and almost grow wild with minimal intervention from me.

Strawberries starting to flower

CAPTAIN'S LOGS

Pssst!  We’ve got new neighbours.  Looks like they’re also refurbishing their house so plenty of trips to our spare bedroom to check on progress with their jobs whilst taking a break from mine. Hmmm, I’m liking that nice fence you’ve put up in your front garden.  May have to tap you up for some tradesperson tips going forward. 

Meanwhile back on Planet Enterprise, the captain’s log shows a large delivery of wood on the driveway.  Being quite dimensionally challenged, I had no idea just how many logs you’d get in a 2 cubic metre truck load but believe me, its lots.  Enough to last a whole winter.  Beam me up Scotty!  Log overload! 

That's a whole lotta logs!

Guess who has spent all afternoon playing the world’s largest game of wood pile Jenga?  Scientifically packing logs into a wood store whilst being watched by several neighbours and next door’s builders.  It’s not as easy as you think.  Hope you all enjoyed this afternoon’s entertainment – shame no-one offered to help.

 

Double layered logs

Perfect fit in our smaller log stores

Going to need more log storage

So, we’re now the proud owners of a Pevex inset convector multi-fuel stove, weaning ourselves off fossil fuels but the scourge of the asthmatic anti-emissions brigade.  You really can’t win.  The only way to keep warm and not upset anyone is to emigrate to Rwanda.  I wonder if I can get my name down for one of those free Government sponsored flights?

 

Pevex 60i inset convector multi-fuel stove

The stove is a perfect fit into the existing fireplace opening.  Installation relatively quick and soot free.  Remember if you are thinking of getting a wood burner, check to see if your property is in a smoke- controlled zone first as this may affect your choice of stove/fuel then make sure the stove itself complies with Defra and other environmental requirements and is fitted by a properly qualified HETAS engineer.  There’s plenty of info online about this sort of stuff so best to invest plenty of time researching the topic before parting with your hard-earned cash as this is a once-in-a-lifetime purchase.

 

Shelby making the most of the warmth

With the wood neatly packed away, its feet up with a cuppa in front of a nice roaring fire.  Aaahh!  Bliss! Seems like I’m not the only one enjoying the warmth!

MAY THE 4TH BE WITH YOU

Happy Star Wars Day! 

 

Long ago in a galaxy far far away ....

May the Force be with you.  Ahhh not West Sussex Constabulary again!  Honest Guv, it wasn’t me …  I haven’t purr-loined any more neighbourhood cats or verbally abused slow serving fast food operatives.  Definitely not guilty. 

Brute force is what’s now needed to transform our stony, weed infested side border into a perfectly planted paradise.  This last fortnight has been a long hard slog of fence painting, stone picking and digging up weeds whilst dodging rain showers, soap and social calls from prospective Tory candidates who are harder to ignore than dog shit shoes.

 

New fence painted

Slowly a garden is beginning to emerge.  The newly painted fence has provided a lovely backdrop for planting and I’ve already got ideas percolating in that department.  I’m after a self-clinging climber called Campsis or Trumpet Vine to grow along the panels to break up the expanse of grey and add a bit of height.

 

Campsis also known as Trumpet Vine

Bridging the corner where the side wall ends and the fence panels begin, I’ve planted a pink rambling rose which I hope to trail across the top of the fence to plug the gap between both structures. 

 

Rambling rose in a lovely pink and white colour

Planted in a nice sunny corner spot

I’m all for low maintenance gardening so anything going into the border has to be fairly fuss free, able to cope with intense sunshine and be repellent to slugs/snails or any other critters looking for a free meal.  Euphorbias fit into this category quite well and I have a nice selection purchased last year ready to go into the soil along with some grasses, hellebores and salvias. 

 

Euphorbias - loved by me but not by slugs

Planting up is a slow process as before anything can be bedded in, the area has to be cleared of weeds and stones then topped up with a nice top soil/compost mix to add a bit of goodness. 

 

Weeding and stone clearing as you go along

So far only the corners of the border have been tackled.  It’s a case of digging for victory to meet in the middle.

 

Planting begun 

Lots of empty spaces to fill

Meanwhile as I slave away topping up my landscaper tan, two pairs of beady eyes are watching my every move from the comfort of their day beds behind the sofa.

 

My gardening audience

As dusk falls another tiny visitor scampers out onto the new patio to enjoy a spot of al fresco dining, Bertie watching its every move from a carefully concealed kitty vantage point.

 

Cute little mousey visitor

Certainly loves bird seed

If I was a Jedi master, I would be channelling the force to speed up this arduous landscaping task – I can’t wait until this is all done.