Merry Christmas readers!
Better late than never I say as it’s been a long while since I took to
the keyboard to regale you with tales of garden revelry or other such
nonsense. Those conspiracy theorists
amongst you might think that I’ve been deliberately hiding after my despicable
spider murder but I can assure you that my mysterious disappearance is simply
due to a prolonged spell of idleness rather than any kind of self-imposed cyber
silence. It’s my new year’s resolution
to make an effort to keep this epic spanned-the-last-decade blog going
as best I can.
In the spirit of Christmas, I have a couple of cyber gifts
to share with you all. The first is my special made up recipe for ‘Pizza Pies’
inspired by an episode of Man vs Food and the second is a party frock I rustled
up out of carrier bags for our family fancy dress Christmas dinner. More about fashion later, now it’s time for
pie!
During the festive doldrums (that never-ending period
between Christmas and the New Year of on-line shopping, pigging out on Pringles
and watching the Italian Job for the thirtieth time) I just happened to be
flicking through a Turkish cookbook when my eyes alighted on a recipe for
mincemeat pides (Turkish pizza). It was
then that I experienced an after dinner cheese and port epiphany. Yeah, it was definitely the cheese that did
it. Some kind of cave matured cheddar
probably ripened with magic mushrooms in a darkened barn of a musty Dorset
dairy bought at the Sturminster Newton cheese festival earlier in the
year. Potent it was and it got me
thinking of Man vs Food.
Ever watched Adam Richman on Man vs Food? He is the Moriarty to Slimming World’s
Sherlock Holmes, promoting a global celebration of gluttony on national TV the
likes of which have never been seen before.
Slimmers beware this man! He’ll
make you crave gooey cream covered pancakes and burgers that dwarf the Eiffel
Tower. Even channel hopping onto a Man
vs Food episode should carry a heart attack warning.
My specially made up pizza pies were so tasty they all got
wolfed down before I could grab the camera but here’s the recipe in case you
want to make some for dinner.
SPECIALLY MADE UP PIZZA PIE RECIPE
1lb plain flour
4 oz melted butter
1 sachet of yeast mixed with 2 teaspoons of sugar and 2
tablespoons of milk
2 eggs
1 teaspoon of salt
Quarter of a pint of milk
500 gms of fresh minced meat
1 finely chopped onion
1 teaspoon of lazy chopped garlic
Salt and pepper to flavour
Chopped fresh parsley
Jar of tomato pizza topping
Chopped pieces of chorizo
Pepperami slices
Sliced mushrooms
Sliced green peppers
Grated mozzarella cheese
Make up a batch of ‘pide’ dough as follows:
Put the flour into a bowl.
Make a well in the centre and pour in the melted butter, eggs, salt and
yeast mixture. Mix this together with
enough milk to make a fairly solid dough but not too sticky or dry. Put the bowl with the dough into a warm place
to ‘prove’ for about 30-40 minutes. I used a
preheated oven but a nice warm airing cupboard would do.
When the dough has risen give this a good pummelling on a
floury surface. Melt some lard and
grease the inside of your pie dishes. I
used 4 inch diameter metal cake tins instead of pie dishes, the kind that are about 1-2
inches high and can be bought in the 99p shop.
Roll out your dough until about 1 cm thick and use this to line your pie
dish.
Next take about 500 gms of fresh minced meat. Fry this in a dash of oil with a finely
chopped onion, a teaspoon of lazy chopped garlic, a pinch of salt, pepper and
some chopped fresh parsley. If you want
to add a bit of poke to your meat then sprinkle some chilli flakes into the
mixture as you fry it.
To assemble the pizza pie, spread a generous dollop of the
tomato pizza topping onto your dough base.
Cover this with a layer of the fried minced meat. Sprinkle the chorizo bits, mushroom slices
and green peppers on top. Add a few
slices of pepperami and any other ingredients that might take your fancy. I thought anchovies but the other half put
his foot down at this point. Finally
sprinkle a good handful of grated mozzarella on top and voila, your pizza pie
is ready to cook.
Bake in the oven at 180C until cooked. Roughly about half an hour or so but you’ll
know when. The cheese should be melted
and the dough a light brown colour. Carefully remove from the metal cake tins before serving.
Adam Richman - if you’re out there and happen to see this blog
then a million thanks for the inspiration that created this mouth-watering
pizza pie. My slimming world diet went
out the window but the plates were licked clean!
MORE ABOUT:
Man vs Food - http://www.travelchannel.com/tv-shows/man-v-food
Turkish Pide - http://www.giverecipe.com/turkish-pide-with-ground-beef.html
Sturminster Newton Cheese Festival - http://www.cheesefestival.co.uk/
