GRETA'S BEDROOM

 “Can you spare any climate change?”

“Nah, sorry mate.  I’ve gone contactless.”

 

Like Eminem, I’ve spent the past few weekends ‘cleaning out my closet’ or to be more precise, ripping the guts out of the understairs cupboard. 

BEFORE - cracked walls & no flooring

Now everyone knows that if you can’t find a home for something, it’s automatically chucked into the deep, dark recesses of the understairs cupboard where it lays forgotten like the lost city of Atlantis doomed to a cluttery grave. 

 

All this clutter needs a home

In the event of a nuclear war you’d be hard pressed to find sanctuary amongst the picnic cooler bags, cycle helmets, unused feather dusters, punctured plastic paddling pool and the chutney you made three years ago.  

With money tight and DIY leftovers cluttering up the garage, we’ve created a temple to recycling or as we’ve called it ‘Greta’s Bedroom’.  To save the planet, we’ve used every bit of surplus stuff to re-decorate the inside of the cupboard and the result is an eclectic mix of paint, paper and of course, MDF.  It’s what you’d call a bit of a DIY dog’s dinner but the end result is a pleasing combination of Kondo and Ikea.

 

Leftover parrot wallpaper on one wall

Leftover Deco Paradiso wallpaper on the other side

We have parrots peeking out on one side and dark blue paradiso paper on the other.  There are deep MDF shelves painted in Farrow & Ball (it’s the poshest cupboard in town) and white laminate ones on the side.  There are hooks to hang the dusters, hooks for the other half’s motor racing caps, hooks for the collapsible wash basket and even a dedicated jam shelf. 

 

Ready for shelves & flooring

Using up leftover MDF & bits of laminate

Dedicated hooks for hats

Shelves painted in leftover Farrow & Ball paint

Hooks for dusters & ironing board

I’m sure that in some parts of London, this closet would be rented out for more than my monthly salary to a family of about 6 Afghans and here I am just using it to store loo rolls or packets of microwaveable rice.  How inconsiderate.

 

Compact 1 bedroom flat?

To give Greta’s Bedroom a bit of a special finish, a nice discounted vinyl plank floor (Homebase) and some industrial black pipe brackets (The Range) to hold up the side shelves. 

 

Bargain bucket flooring

Looks nice and matches the oak doors

Industrial pipe brackets

It's a steal!  One pack did the whole cupboard

Yeah, I think if the Enfant Terrible dropped in for tea she’d be quite impressed and with a lock on the outside of the door, it’ll be the perfect place for her to quietly do her homework whilst trying to think of new ways to save a planet that’s going to die anyway as soon as the sun burns out.

Just enough room for Greta