As a keen knitter, I was much bemused to read an article in this week’s Times
newspaper relating to an alleged racial offence committed at Rochester’s
Christmas Market where someone had the audacity to be selling knitted Mo Farah
dolls. How a knitted doll could be any
more offensive than either a photograph, carving or oil painting of Sir Mo is
beyond me and I’m sure Sir Mo would be more than chuffed to be considered
worthy of this handcrafted homage but clearly to the good people of Kent it’s a
crime worthy of punishment.
Knitting and crocheting is in itself an art form, a medium of woolly
self-expression showcasing patience, dexterity and imagination. It is not a weapon of racialism or any other
‘ism’, it’s merely a relaxing way of passing the time.
Thus taking the view of the good people of Kent and looking at all the
items I’ve recently knitted for our fundraising Christmas Fair then it looks
like half my stock is now destined for the scrapheap on the basis that it would
not be PC compliant as follows:
Foxes – considered vermin and frequently found scavenging in smelly bins
or biting toddlers, not deemed to be cute or cuddly.
Promise I don't bite |
Snowmen – contain the word ‘man’ which is now considered sexist. Should
be referred to as ‘snowperson’ or ‘snow+’ and made less masculine in appearance.
Snowballs! |
Gingerbread Men and Christmas puddings – depict sugary food items thus banned
for encouraging obesity and see previous point on sexism. Re-naming them ‘ginger person’ instantly
brings to mind Prince Harry.
Low calorie tree decorations |
Toy Soldiers – a definite NO as deemed to be condoning warfare or violence and too much of a reminder
that a huge chunk of the British economy centres round the manufacture or
selling of arms to just about anyone with a cheque book.
Nutcrackered |
Nativity figures – blatant religious imagery so offensive to just about everyone
except Christians even though Christmas is technically all about the birth of
Jesus.
Peace and goodwill to all 'person' kind |
Of course if vegans had their way, knitting/crocheting would also be
added to the list of capital offences since both these crafts use wool which
according to them is ‘stolen’ from sheep.
So I guess this makes me and every other knitting biddy out there guilty
of fencing stolen goods every time we knock up a pair of socks or an Argyle
sweater.
Stealing from sheep - punishable by death |
Knitted racialism and wool ‘stolen’ from sheep, I mean have you ever
heard anything more ridiculous? This
time the PC brigade has clearly overstepped the bounds of sense and
sensibility.
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