WHILE SHEPHERDS WASHED

Dear readers, it’s hard to believe that Christmas has rolled round again ending what can only be described as another pretty shit year.  

Wait, is that carol singers I hear in the distance?  What’s that they’re singing?  Ah, it’s 2021’s newest Christmas carol which goes something like this:

 

While shepherds washed their socks by night,

No heating from the ground,

The angel’s car had broken down,

No charger to be found.

 

Fear not said he/she/it for mighty dread

Had seized their smartphone addled minds

Just how to pay their energy bills

Had put them in a bind.

 

Go you to Boris’s town this day

Reached by the HS2 line (except Leeds)

White elephant of social care

Paid by increased N.I.

 

The heavenly babe you there shall find,

All fake nose and fake tits

Its gender has been re-assigned

Tax payer funded bits

 

Thus spoke the sheriff and forthwith

Appeared a blue clad throng

To shove protesters off the road,

Keep traffic moving on

 

Oh glory be for cod and chips

As turkey’s so old hat

Here’s to enormous credit card bills

From buying loads of tat

Merry Christmas everyone!