WAR ON WOODCHIP

Whilst everyone is busy gift shopping online for Crimbo or trying to get their head round the complex tier system being introduced after the current lockdown is lifted, I’ve been waging my own personal war on woodchip.

 

Just when you thought it was safe...

Aagh!  Woodchip!!!

A new weapon has been acquired and it looks lethal!  Good job the postie couldn’t see through the wrapping or I might have been reported to the Rozzers for being armed and dangerous.  Seriously you don’t want to be larking about with this little gizmo.  It’s like a steroid pumped porcupine on wheels.

 

Very very sharp

Available on Ebay or from DIY stores

I tried it out on the lounge wall then on the corridor ceiling.  It sounded like an artillery deployment.  Note to self: only use between the hours of 10 am and 5 pm as our semi- detached neighbour is not likely to be impressed by the sound of distant gunfire or a super-sized cheese-grater on the walls whilst she’s watching Strictly Come Dancing.

 

Take that you horrible paper!

It certainly did a quicker job of scoring the walls than using a metal scraper blade and the extendible pole is perfect for shorties.  Using the score and splash method (repeat 3 times) I was able to clear a huge section of lounge wall in next to no time.

 

Stripping behind the bookshelf

Taking a leaf out of the Tory book, I’ve now implemented my own tier system (Tier 1 being untouched and Tier 4 being totally stripped) to monitor pandemic paper progress (PPP) and this is the current state of the house: 

Upstairs bedrooms – Tier 4

Upstairs corridor – Tier 2

Downstairs corridor – Tier 3

Diner – Tier 4

Lounge – Tier 2

Kitchen – Tier 1 

Scientists recommend no more than 2 people in a DIY bubble.  People in your DIY bubble should only meet indoors unless it’s a specific gardening bubble then you can invite one other person to help with the weeding.  Remember to keep at least 2 meters apart unless you want to trip over cables.  Wear a face mask as paint scrapings get everywhere and you don’t want dusty snot when you blow your nose.  Wash hands as Zinsser DIF flavoured cookies with your cuppa are not very nice.

  

Clearing the wall ready for new radiator

Looking better already

We'll get there in the end