GENERAL ELECTION - VOTE LARRY!

OMG! A general election has finally been announced.  About bleeding time!

And so, the battle for power begins. The tabloids are firing up the presses for coverage of the next 6 weeks’ worth of mud-slinging, insult hurling, finger pointing, back stabbing, accusatory accusations and the never-ending ‘he said/she said’ bitch fights that dominate the political world. I wish I was on a flight to Rwanda but even that’s not happening any time soon.

My primary concern is not whether the Tories or Labour get into no 10 after the 4th of July but more importantly, what would happen to Larry the Mouser? I mean does Sir Keir even like cats? Is he a doggy person or a hamster man? (LOL - that sounds wrong on so many levels).

Vote for Larry

As I’m sure Larry will be left behind for the new incumbent, have provisions for felines been made in any political manifestos?

A spokesperson inside no 10 has described scenes of kitty chaos since the recent announcement. Larry has taken to stripping wallpaper, climbing curtains and sharpening his claws on dishy Rishi’s Adidas Samba trainers in a display of defiance not seen since Arthur Scargill took on Maggie Thatcher during the miners strikes.

Should politicians wear trainers at work?  We can't.

It seems Larry hasn’t forgotten the Tory Government’s plan to introduce harsher policing of rough sleepers in its crime bill and in anticipation of his potentially imminent ‘no fault’ eviction is taking it out on the Sunaks. Good kitty!

The other half re-assures me that Larry as Chief Mouser being deemed a civil servant has a job for life and is also likely to have one of those gold-plated pensions guaranteed to keep him in cat treats until he pops his furry clogs. No shivering under a dirty duvet in a shop doorway for him although the same may not be said for the rest of the Tory mob.

Larry - Chief Mouser moggy