DIG! BABY DIG!

All this talk about idleness and procrastination has finally given me a kick up the jacksie to spur my lazy lump self into some activity.

At last, I’ve decided to get round to digging out part of the garden so I can install a large preformed pond I blagged for free from one of our neighbourhood websites.

It’s a behemoth of a pond. Large enough to do the week’s laundry in if energy costs continue to go up. But it was free and I’m all for re-cycling wherever possible. Besides it’s a large sized Blagdon Damselfly pond and one of these babies will set you back a tidy sum if purchased new.

Free pond anyone?

To prevent us old folks or grandson accidentally falling into the pond, I’ve decided to install it on the lawn in the middle of a raised rectangular bed made of garden sleepers. Being a tidy freak doing this will neaten the edging, contain any border rocks or planting and prevent wet granny ankles or kite surfing tortoises.

Quite how you go about installing a pre-formed pond is one of those exciting, new challenges designed to keep retired brain matter active. Things to learn. Physical jerks (I’m not referring to the other half). Plenty of resistance training (largely from my under-utilised muscles who are resistant to any form of exercise). Fresh air to fill your bonce with positive thoughts and banish mental negativity. A good time filler.

First – decide on location of said pond and mark out a nice rectangle of an appropriate size using whatever implements you can lay your hands on. Aha, there’s a nice patch on the lawn just there opposite the veggie bed that’ll be the perfect spot.

Second – get digging. Delve like your life depends on it. Dead grass, weeds, stones; everything’s got to come up. If you have physical limitations like I have, be prepared to pace yourself as it’s a sweaty, back-breaking job. Chunk up the rectangle so you do a little bit every day. Ensure you have a flask of tea to hand for restorative purposes.

It’s taken me several days just to get rid of the surface turf and get down to bare earth. I now have a brown dirt cowboy patch that will eventually house my new pond. Time to dig, baby dig!

Brown dirt patch - home of new pond