MDINA - THE SILENT CITY

It can hardly be called The Silent City when every nook and cranny is filled with the babble of noisy, phone wielding grockles. 

OMG - more grockles!

Like Valletta, visiting Mdina is all about timing since it’s another favourite of cruise ships or coach parties. Don’t leave it to the weekend. Get there either very early in the morning or late afternoon.

Very pretty

The quietest place in town are the Catacombs, ancient underground burial chambers hewn from rock of which there are many to explore if you like running round dark, chilly grave sites. The only thing you can hear is the sound of a mobile phone smashing against the stone floor as punters scramble around the uneven dimly lit crypts.

Exploring the catacombs in Rabat

Wow, these burial chambers are so cool

St Agatha’s Catacombs opposite the larger St Paul’s catacomb complex are well worth the 5 EUR entry ticket not only because of the charismatic tour guide but because there are actual bones laid in some of the graves. Come on, you can’t beat skeletal remains when it comes to ghoulish appeal.

Underground church in St Agatha's catacombs

Double bubble for me as there is also an interesting museum probably housing Malta’s largest collection of rocks. Perfect pebbles, yay! 

Madonna of the perfect pebble

Makes my fossil/pebble collection look feeble in comparison. And of course, there are also bones…

Remains found in the catacombs

Whilst all the pretty young influencers are posing on the ancient fortified parapets, we’re continuing on our gruesome tour of Mdina with a visit to the underground Dungeons.

Mdina fortifications

Here you’ll find a series of horrible histories from bubonic plague to Spanish Inquisition and all manner of hideous tortures in between.

Gruesome torture tableux

Still on the NHS waiting list

Mdina Dungeons - a horrible bit of fun

Including some interesting head gear called Masks of Shame. There’s a lot we could learn from history and I can definitely see a role for these in modern times.

Masks of shame - if the cap fits...

Basically, transgressors are made to wear a mask befitting of the crime committed. Male chauvinist? You get a pig mask. Spreading malicious gossip? Poking your nose into people’s business? Stirring up trouble? There’s a natty little number to fit the bill. 

Maybe we could design a few to cover today’s hate crimes such as internet trolling. Imagine having to wear a troll mask for a week in public – oh the shame of it!

There’s something for everyone in Mdina – interesting little alleyways, a splash of greenery, wonderful architecture and of course, a fabulous cathedral.

Even more stunning than the one in Valletta

Wonderful architecture

An outdoor garden - Malta style

Would you believe it but behind the cathedral, down one of those narrow streets, I actually stumbled across the equivalent of a Maltese charity shop. This wonderful emporium housed an eclectic collection of china knick-knacks, the sort you buy on holiday then gather dust for the next millennia.

Maltese charity shop - a wonderful Aladdin's cave

And when you’ve had enough of it all, there’s the antics of the local lizards sunning themselves in the park gardens outside the Silent City to keep you entertained.

Any sign of that Maltese falcon?